Obsession

Hello folks. Yeah I know I've been incommunicado again. But you're used to it now right? So what's my excuse this time? Well I blame obsession.

I have an obsessive personality. It's something I've been aware of for quite a while. I fall for things easily and hard. It was brought to my attention when I was backpacking round Italy. In Florence a group of us from our campsite went out one evening and we came across an artist working on canvases with spray cans. He was making the most amazing landscapes I have ever seen. One in particular I fell in love with. But it was an A3 canvas and I was only half way through a 5 week tour. There was no way I could take it with me even if I could afford it. I was devastated. One of the guys in our group told me I fall in love too easily.

He was right.

Obsession with things, people, places, memories is really easy for me. It's closely related to an addictive personality in my opinion. I fall for things and they become obsessions. As a general rule they are unattainable things, or unrequited loves. Things that will be tinged with melancholy because of this. It is this obsession and inability to let go that colours my personality. Fortunately not as much as it used to. It has been a very long time since I have felt obsessive about anything. But what has come along at the moment is so benign as to be hilarious. My current obsession? Buffy. Yup that's right, Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

Funny right? The thing is it's been 14 years since the show first aired. It ran between 1997 and 2003 which puts me at 15 to 21. So my formative years. I watched it from the beginning but missed most of the last series. I was about the same age as the characters so their journey was mine (minus the apocalypses). Watching it again I am struck by the characters, the psychology behind them. It is fascinating. And it is obsessive. I want to get to the end so I can know what happens but I also want to see where they go. I want to delve into their personalities. The characters I fancied as a young girl are now attractive on multiple levels. I identify with scenarios I'd never noticed before because I am no longer living them but looking at them one step removed. Like I said, it's fascinating.

So this is the reason I'm not around much at the moment. Too much Buffy to watch. Don't worry though, there are only about 11 episodes to go. Then you get to listen to me dissect them hahahaha!